they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
