yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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