The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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