I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You've changed since you got that strap on
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
