Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
