brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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