last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
