i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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