the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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