She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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