And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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