My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize