But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
