My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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