Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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