I'm really into asian looking animals
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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