i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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