To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
