***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
wrigley field is MILF paradise
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
