oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
