He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
i now understand why vodka
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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