hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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