after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
