all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
