She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
