Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
