Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize