yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
