i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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