He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
