Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
