Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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