How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
The adults are the big ones right?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
