Sponge bath it is.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Terrible idea I love it
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
