do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Randomize
