We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
there is puke in my bra ... again
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize