I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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