I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize