when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
