The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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