woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
