There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
You smell like stripper and shame
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
