i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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