I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
