THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
