A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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