By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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