i already hear my dad disowning me
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
