He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
