i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
