i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
