tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
